One more day. Just one. Then we get to be free. I need some sleep next to you. To ease my mind and lift the weight off my shoulders. I just need you. Have not called my father recently, no desire to do so. I'm being a coward and not facing the confrontation that has yet to come. Where are you Christmas, why can't I find you. Then I can go see my brother's pretty face, I can feel my grandmother's soft hands on my cheeks. Lalala, love. Your childish glances are getting old. My attitude has come back, my clumsiness following. Once again, I find myself falling and running straight into doors. I'm blind. Blinded by love.

I can't get my mind straight. My optimistic attitude has been replaced by one of doubt. Will I ever be good enough? We're discovering this answer day by day. I'm just.. everything you're not. My insecurities come out in the classroom, and they lie there for people to step on. I worry about you, when you should be the one thing I don't need to.